Are you ready for some football? Were you ready for some SUPER BOWLS football? You know: “Ready.” Drinking brews at a vaguely-Irish sports bar, walls dripping with 70 inch HDTV ADHD screens. You know, READY. Like, you have friends over and you’re all on your cellphones Instagramming the 20-layer taco dip you saw on Buzzfeed.
You’re ready to settle in, find the perfect seat on the couch to photograph the TV screen, you have your computer out in case some sort of fantasy thing happens, you are following along with a hashtag, virtually cheering in your Facebook feed, and ignoring texts from your brother because you paused the DVR while you were in the can. No spoilers.
It’s the SUPER BOWL, you guys. Baltimore Ravens vs. the San Francisco 49ers. Tough choices to make: Beyonce or the Puppy Bowl. And we’re watching it together. We’re super-watching the super bowl. We’re watching it from every angle imaginable.
So many historical things took place.
- The Ravens beat the 49ers, 34-31. That’s like, really close.
- Both were undefeated teams, like, forever undefeated. And losing this game would be the first loss in the history of footballs.
- For the first time, the two head coaches were brothers: Jim and John Harbaugh. Brothers pitted against each other. Which probably totally sucked.
- Beyonce commanded the spirits of Destiny’s Child to RISE AGAIN during the half-time show. There was so much glitter. It was awesome.
So we thought we were ready for some football, and we were to an extent, but weren’t ready for what was going to happen in the third quarter. Baltimore was already up 28-6 and after Beyonce rode off into the sunset on her hovercraft, we were lulled back into our pizza comas and struggled to care about anything other than that adorable, pint-sized Darth Vader Volkswagen commercial.
We weren’t ready for a blackout. A system failure in the stadium’s electrical system. With one giant sigh, the Superdome’s power slumped dimly to half mast; the field now illuminated only by the tens of thousands of smart phones taking pictures of a blackout.
So we waited. Announcers hemmed and hawed. First two minutes. Then five…Then ten…Then 20, then 30–it lasted a total of 34 minutes. That makes running around and throwing a ball really hard. Like, they didn’t even try.
So what did we do? As spectators with nothing to watch, we headed to the internet. Well, we were kind of already there, we just opened up a new tab.
What were the players going to do? You can’t play football in the dark. Nobody was ready for THIS.
But you know who was ready? From the moment the game started, who was poised and ready to pounce on such an opportunity–the opportunity to comment on what we were all experiencing? MOTHER FUCKING OREO COOKIES was ready.
After brands across the world spent millions of dollars for 30 seconds of Super Bowl commercial fame, Oreo–with one Twitter fart to the wind–went viral. Retweeted over 15 thousand times. You know what you can do in the dark? You can still dunk an Oreo cookie.
And we as a nation all watching the same Facebook rants, the same hashtag trollin’, we all saw it spread across the internet like wild fire.
We were shocked. We were all living this moment together and a cookie told us how to feel about what we were going through. THE COOKIE WAS WATCHING THE SUPER BOWL. Sure, we thought we had opinions on the matter, but obviously we were wrong.
THE COOKIE WAS RIGHT. WE COULD STILL EAT AN OREO IN THE DARK.
The marketing world lost their collective minds. The word “culture jacked” was tossed out. You know, culture jacking. The act of stealing a well-known cultural reference and spinning it to cater to a brand’s message.
But Oreo. It is one smart cookie. Their secrets hit the wire nearly instantly and it was revealed that the digital marketing agency 360i held a 15-person social media team hostage on game day. Blackout happened, America was distracted, everyone was waiting for something to happen, and the quickly designed image hit the Twitters and the Facebooks. And we all saw it. And we reacted just as they wanted us to.
Oreo. Oreo was ready for some football.